My Story: How I Got My True Love Back

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Updated: December, 2019

Meet Charice:

Once upon a time, there was a girl. She thought she was pretty hot stuff, and vowed that she would never, ever waste her time fighting for a guy. The way she figured it, if a man didn’t know how special she was, it was his loss. And the idea of getting back together with an ex? Preposterous! In her mind, that was the lamest of all lame moves that other girls pulled. As far as she was concerned, relationships end for a reason and shouldn’t ever be revisited.

There are too many fish in the sea, why waste your time on one that’s already gone bad?

You want to know a secret? That girl was me, Charice. Not too long ago, in fact. But then, I found this amazing guy. And we had an incredible relationship. We’re talking bird singing and bees buzzing kind of incredible – the stuff that fairy tales are made of.

About six months in though, I got cold feet. I know, I know – why?!? I can’t really explain it. Maybe it was because my entire life, I really had been that strong and independent girl. For the first time ever, I was relying on this other person, and it scared me.

So I dumped him. I pushed him away and went back to doing my own thing and pursuing my own bliss, convinced that there was something better out there for me and that I didn’t need a man in my life to find it. Not any man. Not even him.

But you know what? I missed him. I missed how much we laughed together and how truly he just got me. I kept thinking I would stop missing him, but that day never came. Unfortunately, by the time I realized how important he was to me, he had already moved on.

I had hurt him, and he wasn’t all that willing to look back or to offer me another chance. Everyone I knew told me I needed to move on too. That I needed to learn from my mistakes and not make the same ones the next time around, but that he and I were a lost cause.

I knew better though. I knew he was the one – I just had to remind him of that fact.

So I threw myself into researching and studying methods for getting an ex back. I analyzed everything I read and cultivated the perfect plan – the plan that would eventually find us back together and in love.

That was three years ago, and the ring on my finger today should tell you one thing: that plan worked. We are happier than ever, all because I knew he was worth fighting for.

Now, do I believe all relationships are worth that same effort? Absolutely not. Sometimes pride gets in the way and women end of fighting for relationships that truly are better off dying. I would never encourage anyone to be that woman; desperate and yearning for a relationship that wasn’t all that good to begin with.

But when it really was the right relationship and things just went inexplicably wrong, sometimes it’s worth the fight.

Some guys are worth fighting for.

Which is why I have compiled the information on this site here – to share with you what I learned and to show you how to get your own true love back. For years I’ve been offering this same advice to friends, and it finally felt like time to commit it all to writing.

I’ve been there, in your shoes, and I know exactly what you are feeling right now.

I also know that you can get your ex back.

It takes work and even a bit of patience, but if you are truly committed to reigniting that old flame – I am ready to help you fight!

I would love to hear about your story. Make sure to sign up to my newsletter to get my best advice.

23 Replies to “My Story: How I Got My True Love Back”

  1. Hi, can you help me. My partner an I were together 9 years. He went overseas for 3 months an met someone else. He broke it off with me when he got back an then said after a week that he had made a mistake an wanted to try again. He’s getting help as he knows he has issues. One minute he’s talking about us as a family an the next he’s saying he will support me an our daughter if after he’s done some work on himself he decides to be on his own. It’s tearing me apart.

  2. Hi!i really want to get him back,but i dont know ehat to do!
    Could you please help me and send me an email for helping me in person?
    I have lots of problem
    I really appreciate if you help me to get him back
    I really love him

  3. Hi there,

    So I have been with my guy for three years. We moved in together a year ago. He initiated getting a dog and then a second dog a month into the living arrangement. Lads year he gave me a promise ring and I him after we had some trust issues on his end and he wanted to ensure my faith in the relationship. We talked about kids and our families becoming one. Since January we had a lot of stress including upper level college courses, bills, work, and our dogs. Too much responsibility too fast perhaps. But the marriage thing kept coming up and he couldn’t used definites any more. The. We fell into a routine where we lost the spark for a while with lots of bickering. I realized this and tried to make a change. But break up threats were being tossed around. After a bad case of jealousy and boundary bullying on my part, about a month ago, he broke up with me. We were still living together and finishing our semester so we were living our normal life. After four days I asked him to give it the rest of the semester and then a few weeks of summer to truly work on it an perhaps see a counselor. He agreed and thought it would be smart and promised to truly work on it and try. We had an AMAZING month. Great intimacy, went out and were active, ate healthy and splurged, while being loving and affectionate. I felt there was no need for counseling so I didn’t bring it up again. I even checked in occasionally asking how he felt and if he had thought about breaking up. He would say he loves me and has had a lot of fun with me and the breakup hadn’t been crossing his mind. Fast forward to 13 days ago. I had my last final, the semester was over, weight lifted off my chest. We were going to take the dogs to the beach and have a celebratory dinner. But I with the stress of class out of the way I initiated the talk we hadn’t fully has in a month. I said we have a lot of plans to make (summer classes, visiting our families, renewing our lease) and I want to make sure we are in the same page. He pushed back saying lets do this another time and I held my ground, feeling nervous and confused. He said he still thinks we should break up: not ready for the relationship(explain that after three years), not happy, needs space, to find himself, etc. I was shocked. The past month had been rid of our toxic bevahiors and full of love and support. But he insisted that he had decided and his mind was made up. So we packed up my stuff and drove 12 hours from NC to NY together. I was crying and trying to remind him of everything amazing we had. He would tear up and hold my hand and comfort me. He seemed so heartbroken by his actions and my feelings but would not budge. Then he gets me to my parents house and helps me unpack. His dad picked him up and as I said goodbye he insisted that we shouldn’t talk that night but the next day. It’s 10 days later and no response from him. I stopped trying after three days and his mother took over communicating through mine. I am a 23 year old woman. He is a 22 year old man. Our lease decision needs to be made by Friday and bills still need to be paid. We are both in NY with or families. I want to start over with him. We have he love, the chemistry, the attraction, but we need the tools to healthily be together. I don’t know if he will ever give me that chance. Neither of us had friends other than each other. He had some long distance friends from Arizona who he would talk on the phone with. I know we need to be independent individuals in order to come together to have a healthy dynamic. But do you think I can get to this point with him? His psychotic/over attached mother has been against me since day 1 and now he’s with her everyday saying God knows what to him. It’s been 10 days since I’ve seen or heard from him. And 7 since I’ve tried reaching out. Please help me get my love back. He’s the light of my life and I miss him terribly and our little family and amazing life.

  4. Hi Charice. My name is Eric, I’m 22 years old from Argentina. I know you write for women but I found your ebooks reviews pretty intresting.

    I was dating a girl (19) for the last two months until she suddenly decided to break up with me last week. She wasn’t my girlfriend but everything was going that way. We never had big fights or anything and we were always laughing with each other. She said she didn’t loved me anymore and that we didn’t have a connection.
    Which guide is suitable for me? I was thinking in Text Your Ex Back (but I don’t know why I can’t get it, I think the page isn’t working) but Pull Your Ex Back called my atention too.
    Since she wasn’t my girfriend I believe that if I make a too long no-contact period she will forget me. What should I do?

  5. Hey here’s my story. Worked together then got together over 10yrs ago bought a house and all that,were together 8yrs broke up over irreconcilable issues. I went NC for 12 days then sent a Christmas card we remained in contact and later (about 5 mths) really good friends would eat together go out together and a year later he asked me back. Roll the clock on 14mths we broke up again 3wks ago. I was thinking things were going well actually. He has some personnal issues that was heard at work and I asked could his son have said anything and he lost it and hung up on me (I was at work). I text him straight away telling him what I actually meant and he ignored me. We didn’t see or talk to each other for the weekend. He called on Monday and we broke up he said that I wasn’t supportive (I am very, he took that one back), I don’t stop what I’m doing when he calls in to hug and kiss him, he can’t believe I hadn’t asked him to move back in, we weren’t having a lot of sex (he refused to stay during the week) we can’t stay at his he’s currently living with his son, girlfriend and new baby it would be weird. So I went NC he contacted me a week later to ask about the dogs I work shift so I’m not there every second week, I said we can’t rely on each other like last time but maybe in time hope you understand, he said I do but of you ever need anything I’m here. I didn’t reply went back nc.
    I then heard he met a woman 5 days after we spilt (2 days before he text about dogs) she asked him for coffee he said no then asked our mutal friend for her number and started texting her – he’s entitled to we broke up but it hurts.
    I panicked that he was moving on the usual, so 2wks almost after we split I bump into him at my local shop ask can we talk. I put it all out there I still love him, think if we both cop’d on and gave it a good try no if you’re not kissing me hello then I’m not doing it carry on, move back in and make a proper go of it, we could have something great. I also said that he should’ve came to me and asked about moving in and told me how he was feeling. He said it wasn’t up to him to ask? 
    Anyway I asked him to think about it, the next day he called and said he doesn’t want to, what does it mean that it was so fast? He said that we had our chance and blew it, he fkd up the first time but we did the second. It seems he wasn’t getting what he needed from me to listen to him (he talks about work a lot, it’s hard sometimes), affection – but then he stopped… instead of talking about us, he said we get on really really well but felt we had become more like friends. 
    So I’m on 8 days nc, at the moment I’m wanting him back still and kicking myself for not asking him to move back in etc.. maybe in time I’ll feel different. I don’t know if he’s still chatting or meeting the new woman, I know she’ll be filling the gap of my absence for now. This will be the first time in 12 yrs that I didn’t wish him happy birthday (5 days ago, 3 into nc) will it even have an effect on him? The longest we haven’t spoken is 12 days in 12yrs. I miss him so much.

  6. Hi Charice,

    So would like more info experience if 5 yes post me leaving my husband , no cheating, have evaluated a ton, he waited for a year or so but I was so mad from the divorce and have had to do some soul searching to figure how we both made mistakes, now he is engaged?. I want him and my family back! Did the text about fun memory and he told me not to send anymore as we both have moved on. I said sorry you are right and that glad he is happy etc. what is next? Is there any hope ?

  7. Hi Charice,

    I found your blog by accident and I must tell you, reading through the messages as really helped me.
    I have been dating my boyfriend for 2 years now but we were casual friends for 13 years before that. Unfortunately we live in 2 different states.

    we both love each other but due to work constraints, we don’t see as often as we should. I always make efforts to travel to go see him and even when i’m there he barely has time for me.

    A few weeks ago, he sent me a text telling me he would like for us to end our relationship and just be friends because he doesn’t like the way he is treating me. I told him i understood although i was hurting. I have never loved anyone this much.

    He made casual contact after that and one day i lost it and begged and pleaded with him to reconsider. After that he broke off all contact. i thought i would lose my mind and spend days in a deep depression but never contacted him back.

    I miss him so much everyday and its been over a month now. i have good and bad days. my question is, is he a candidate for the 30 day rule? how do i get over him?

    1. The No Contact Rule is something you do for yourself. It’s a period for you to focus on yourself and reflect on what’s important for you. Take this time to determine what went wrong and what you would change for your next relationship, regardless if it’s with your ex or not. If your ex isn’t making any effort to be with you, then you shouldn’t do more to make things work. However, if you really want him back, you need to make a big impact in his life.

  8. Hi Charice,
    My ex left me since a month saying he’s just not ready for any commitment and he doesn’t want a relationship he only wants to be alone and find his happiness alone, though I could swear how we were doing so great finally and suddenly! He changed and asked for a break then he broke up with me while I’m still so in love with him, I’m tired of waiting and can’t wait no more to get him back into my arms! How do I do that when he’s always unstable and stubrron and only listens to himself most of the time? I really love this guy!

    1. Unfortunately, he’s just being a guy which is perfectly normal. You have to accept who he is and what he’s going through because he’s probably at a stage in his life trying to figure things out. If you really love this guy, support him and be there for him. Don’t push him to label the relationship and be present when your time and energy allows. This is also a moment where you can truly show who you are and convince him that you’re a keeper.

  9. How can I get my ex back? When he’s the one who left me and forgot how it feels like to be with me and that now he changed , what did you do to get ur ex back can u let me know ?

    1. Every situation and breakup story is different. What worked for me may not apply to you. What you should start off is by understanding how your relationship went and areas you think you can improve to be a better person and lover. One thing I like to suggest is to go back and remember the first time your ex laid eyes on you. What was he like? What about you? How did you change over the course of the relationship? If you want more tips, I would suggest that you sign up for my free newsletter which contains a series of lessons to set you up for the best chance to get him back.

  10. Hi Charice,

    I’ve been following Text your ex back. I’ve been out of NC for 2 months. I’ve run into my ex twice the last few weekends resulting in him texting me wanting to catch up. But he kind of drops out of the conversation after we text for a bit. I just need to do something that will push him over the edge to actually follow through with meeting up. I am going to a music festival this weekend. Last year we went together. I am pretty sure he will go this year. I’m not sure if I should wait and see if he texts me again or should I send a text on the day like “I am just getting ready for (festival) and was thinking what an amazing time we had last year. Hope you have a great day.” What do you advise?

    1. If you’ve been initiating communication most of the time, it’s probably better to wait and see if he starts a conversation. Since there’s a music festival coming up, you could try to find another way to hint of the event to see if it gets his attention. Send a text message at the last minute (or during the festival) if he doesn’t respond. If he’s actually there, then that would be a bigger surprise.

  11. Hey! I just signed up for your emails and I’m super excited to be part of this. So here’s my story, I’ll try to make it brief. This guy and I started liking each other 2 years ago but ended up getting into a fight because he stopped liking me. A few days later he told me he regretted it and wanted me back. After thinking about it, I took him back and we dated for a year. This man is truly all I’ve ever wanted and everything I need. However, 3 months ago he dumped me because he lost feelings. I can tell his emotions have been up and down since the breakup but he hasn’t done anything, he seems happy :/ so, there’s this other guy in my life who’s very attractive and were very good friends (everyone thinks we’re dating but we aren’t!) but I far prefer my ex to him. (Maybe my ex feels like I’ve rebounded?) anyway, I’m dying to get my ex back, I did all the right things (no contact, not nagging, etc.) but he still doesn’t come back. I need him in my life. What do I do?? Thank you for your time 🙂

    1. Thanks for signing up to the newsletter. I’m sure the lessons will help you a lot especially Lesson 2 in your case. Based on your story, I feel that this may be the missing ingredient you need to understand and help you get closer to understanding your ex.

  12. Hello Charice, I have used these example phrases of ‘textuourexback’ and got really positive results. I moved too fast though and he withdrew again. We have been on and off now for about 8months and now he is finally gone. Doesn’t reply to any my text. It’s been a week since I sent the last one even asking for his help but still no reply. What can I do now? Can I still use the same text on the same person? Thank you.

    1. No, don’t use the same text messages. Give him some time and space and perhaps he’ll initiate. If not, try to meet him in person.

    1. I’d love to help. The first thing to do is implement the No Contact Rule. I’ve written an article about what the NC rule is about. Hope this will help for now.

  13. Hey is there any way i could get my ex back because i really love him so much. My situation right now is exactly the same like what you gone through before.i was cold feet too and everytime i felt that way, i asked for a break up. Many times not just once. Is there anything I could do to make things right? Some advices would do.

    1. First, you need identify the problems in the relationship especially the parts where its your fault. Work on these issues first to become a better person for yourself. Once you have the confidence to start a new relationship, you can initiate contact with your ex and slowly reel him in.

  14. Hi Cherice, its me Melissa..i wanted to know how to get my ex back when he already lost his spark, felt tired of all what we’ve been through and feel so much worry about his future (job). i’ve been with this guy (now my ex) for more about 4 years, we have been up and down for the last 2years. i admit its because my bad habit and behavior.he is such a wonderful guy, he is care, he is patient and he loves me so much. one day in Jan 2012 he said he needed a break, he was unsure about his future what is going to be and he cant see me in his future like that because he is so worried that he cant make me happy and dont know when he is ready to settle down, when our age actually is the right time and normal for settling down which is 26. i couldnt handle this situation, i was nagged, i was pleaded and begged him to think about it again. when he said he needed time to figure it out by himself, i was blamed him because he broke his own promises not to ever leave me no matter how hard the situation is. then..he was coming back after half a year we have been separated and he said he wanted to try to start our relationship all over again. during our separation time he kept contacted me by calling me every once or twice in a week. but, its not last long, it finally break again after we got back together for only 1year. i knew for such a long time i have been put him under pressure about the ‘marriage’ issues although i know in his situation now (financial problem) he couldnt afford that. we had no contact after that for 2 weeks until one night he sent me a message that he wanted to give it try once again because our relationship is still worth fighting for. after that we decided to take it slowly as a best friend as we decided to give it try for 3months and see how is going, we meet every once a week, we message each other everyday. after 3months both of us need to make a final decision whether we want to give it try or just end it. unfortunately he still decided to be by himself, to fix his life and himself, to figure out what he exactly he want to do about his future, what step he must do..i thought in 3months in our probation time everything is going well, but we broke up again for the 3rd time. do u think in my case i still get a chance to change his mind and make him love me again like he used to and want to get back with me?i deleted all his contacts, his blackberry messager and i dont want to contact him either because no matter i have tried to convinced him before that i will accept everything about him also about the ‘marriage issue’ he just want to be alone, he needed his space to figure it all and for this time he not ready to be in a relationship. what the best thing i should do? i still want him back but i cant force him to fight again for us when he already felt tired…maybe i just have to accept the fact and let him move on?? thanks for all your help and support, hope you will find a solution for me to help me once again reunite with my former lover and be lasted forever

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